Month: October 2017

Halloween Overseas

download (1)

I think a lot about the fact that the United States of America is a huge melting pot. It is full of different cultures and different types of people, and sometimes it seems like we don’t have much in common.

However, living overseas for most of the last decade has made me realize that we have more in common than we think.

One of those things is Halloween.

halloween

People from the US ask me “What is Halloween like in other places?” and I have to laugh a little. Most Americans don’t seem to realize that the tradition of Halloween comes from the good old US of A.

Yes, there were some traditions from Europe that we borrowed to integrate into the holiday. However, pretty much every part of Halloween is uniquely American.

pumpkins-3

Carving Pumpkins: a pumpkin is a native American plant. It used to make me so sad when I was living in Korea and my friends would say “Are you going to carve pumpkins?” After all, how could I? They don’t sell pumpkins in Korea. Why would they?

hungy-halloween-candy-iStock_000021704258Large-E

Trick-Or-Treating: This tradition was started by candy companies in the 1950’s. When I used to tell kids in other countries about it, they flat-out called me a liar. It is unheard of in other countries that a child could go up to a stranger’s door, say “Trick or Treat,” and get candy.

images

Costumes: Okay, sometimes people in other countries dress up. British people sometimes dress up for bachelor parties, for example. However, it is nothing like it is in America. I remember the other teachers back at Avalon English being aghast at the thought of grown-ass adults dressing up as unicorns and stuff. I just laughed. Of course we do! And it’s awesome!

download

Guam doesn’t really do Halloween any more than Korea did. They are technically a US territory, but the holidays are different. This is a shame, and I lament it every year.

See, Halloween isn’t just one of the coolest uniquely American things; it is also my favorite holiday.

I know, that’s weird for an adult. But the thing is, Halloween is for everyone. You might say: “All holidays are for everyone.” If you have a close family, it makes sense that you think that way. However, some of us know that it’s not true.

download (2)

Example: Christmas. 

I hate Christmas. Let me tell you why:

If you don’t have a family, at first, you might try to go to other people’s family gatherings.

Then they do presents, and no one got you anything, and it’s awkward.

You realize that you are intruding. They invited you, but they don’t really want you there. You feel like shit, and you learn to never do that again.

christmas-alone

So then the next year, you do a Christmas “for people who don’t have families.”

You get a whole bunch of lonely orphans together, and you can just imagine how cheerless that ends up being. You all sit around and think about your family being dead, or on drugs, or estranged. And big surprise, it sucks.

article-0-07AF9D2C000005DC-263_468x376

So after a few years you just spend it alone. You try not to cry, but at some point you know you will.

Maybe you go to a bar and get drunk. Maybe you microwave a dinner and sit there alone eating it. But it sucks. It is just devastatingly painful.

I spent nearly 20 years alone until I was adopted by the Layman family. You simply can’t imagine the pain of 20 years alone on Christmas. It hurts so much that even after being adopted, I still can’t stand Christmas.

Drinking again

I know that people with families won’t understand this. They will argue that they really do want you to come be with their family, or that you should go volunteer or be with friends. They don’t understand that it’s not just being psychically alone. It’s having attention drawn to the fact that you are alone in the world. That is just a horrible feeling.

So I don’t like Christmas and all the other family holidays. They are mostly foreign holidays anyway.

60600f12f4dc6aada73c23d2378de471--party-decoration-ideas-ideas-party

Halloween is not like that. Halloween is for everyone! And it’s American!

Ergo, even though I am on Guam where no one celebrates, I will be dressing up and celebrating just like I did in Korea. People can stare and think I am nuts. That’s fine.

This is the best holiday in the whole world. It’s better than the Color Festival, Buddha’s Birthday, and any other holiday that has been dreamed up elsewhere in the world. I never feel more patriotic than I do on Halloween.

images (1)

College Reunion

girls one.jpg

I recently went on a long trip.  One of the things I did was go to my unofficial college reunion in Arizona.

My best friends in college were two lovely women named Sidra and Clarice. Both of them are doing well now, and it was a lot of fun to catch up. I am really glad that I took the time and spent the money to make it possible.

The reunion brought up a lot of thoughts and feelings for me. Most of them are sort of private, but I did want to share a few things that might help others.

1. Keep in touch with snail mail.

I am always surprised at how much it means to people to get post cards and seasonal greeting cards. I guess this is because mail is always exciting. You can hold it in your hand, and put it on your refrigerator. It is a way to display that someone thought of you. Most people just get bills and junk mail, so getting things you didn’t expect that make you happy can be very special.

I have been sending post cards and holiday greeting cards for about 20 years, and I think this is part of what makes people feel like they are still connected to me, even after years apart. I had not seen Sidra and Clarice in 10 years due to all of us being in different countries, but we still felt connected and like we were good friends.

Though it might seem silly, I will also add that I never got a label maker, nor do I run envelopes through my printer. I hand address each envelope, write a personal message referencing things in the person’s life, and include a Holiday Letter talking about my year. People bring up these personal touches when they see me, and thank me for them. That is how I know that they matter.

2. Make connections in college.

We all know that nepotism is how people get the really good jobs. The narrative is that anyone can do anything if they go to college, but the reality is that without connections, your degree is meaningless.

In college, I was so busy working to support myself, studying, and looking after my wayward aerospace engineer boyfriend that I missed a lot of chances to connect. I should have gone to my professor’s office hours and “kissed ass,” as they say. I should have tried to make more friends on campus. (And, probably richer more powerful friends.) I should have seen the scholarship breakfasts I had to go to as an opportunity instead of a burden.

The truth is; I was so busy surviving that I forgot to live. I wish that I had put more effort into climbing ladders instead of just working hard and thinking that would be enough to succeed. I bought the lie. I regret that.

3. Take chances.

I still regret winning a scholarship to study in Costa Rica in college, but then deciding not to take it. I was afraid that my boyfriend would get kick out of school while I was away (since he had so much trouble getting up in the morning.) I was worried that my boss would replace me at work. I was worried about where to store my stuff…

The truth is, I still regret not going.

If you get the chance to have a new or different experience, just take it! Even if you have to find a new job when you get back and put your stuff in storage. Just do it!

It’s true what they say: You only regret the chances you don’t take.

Over the years I have done a lot of wild things, like running away with the Renaissance Festival and then taking off to teach in South Korea. I don’t regret any of those things. But I still regret not doing that semester abroad.

I am hardly an oracle of brilliant advice. I am just a person who has been wandering around the world for awhile now, and I would like to think that those three pieces of advice are pretty solid.

I guess it also goes without saying that you should never lose touch with your friends. I am so glad I kept in touch with Clarice and Sid all these years!

Bagby Hot Springs

A lot of people do the Baby Hot Springs hike because they want to soak in the hot springs. This is a perfectly reasonable thing to do most of the time, but not while I was there!

I was in Oregon was the worst heat wave that they had seen in a long time, and even up around Mount Hood, it was still extremely hot.

Still, we went up to soak our feet in the cold stream near the hot springs, and to relax in the shade where it was cool.

After three years of hiking through jungle, I have to say, it’s really very pretty in Oregon. I forgot the dark shades of green that you find in the forest, and how beautiful the bark is on pine and cedar trees.

As you know,  love plants.

And, the plants in the forest near the hot springs are so lush and pretty even in the midst of the heat and the dry weather.

We even saw various kinds of neat fungus along the trail.

I went with my adopted mom and my husband. The three of us are not the kind of hikers who go for distance. We go for experience. And, this is an easy hike and a nice experience.

That reminds me, if you are interested in other easy hikes in Oregon, I would recommend The Creaky Knees Guide, which my mom got me for my birthday.

It has a lot of trails for those of us who are looking for more -shall we say- relaxing hikes?

I should warn that the stream is snow and glacier melt, so it’s not really a good idea to swim in it. We did see some people jump in (seemingly to prove that they could.) However, they got right back out.

Sometimes people don’t realize that you can get hypothermia in Oregon in the dead heat of summer. However, when you are in 35-degree water for too long, I assure you that you can.

The pools in the stream near the hot springs are absolutely deep enough to swim in. There is no reason you can’t swim in them. If you are hot and sweaty, there is no doubt that it would be refreshing.

Just, don’t stay in too long.

Mom soaked her feet because they swell when she hikes. She’s a nurse, so it was really nice of her to go hiking with us in spite of the fact that she spends 14-hour days on her feet all week at the VA.

However, I think we all enjoyed spending some time in nature. There is something about running water, moss, and deep green trees that soothes the soul, if you know what I mean. It just feels good.

There stream is mostly wide with a lot of deep pools, but it funnels through this one part where it is narrow, and I took a video because I love the way water looks crashing over rocks. Enjoy!

Public Service Announcement

Not cool

I am getting sort of frustrated with a few things I see on the island, and I wanted to talk about them. First and foremost, I want to say that I am horrified when people don’t stay two meters away from endangered animals, as is required by federal law.

Fish Eye is a problem. I know it. You know it. Everyone on Guam knows it. They feed the marine life by dumping chum in the water, and it can cause all kinds of bad situations like the semi-domestic barracuda that lives there and has injured people, or the turtle that learned the dangerous and unfortunate lesson that people equal food, and paid for that lesson with his life.

While we can all look around and see that other people are doing things wrong, let us please also remember that others’ mistakes do not give us the right now also break laws and behave badly. Do not touch or get within two meters of endangered animals. This includes the native birds, coconut crabs, sea turtles, and anything else you might encounter that is rare and in need of protection.

Please, don’t pet or feed the animals.

so not cool

Next up: the coral is alive. Coral is a living colony of organism called polyps. and they get crushed when you stand on them.

I see people all the time at Gun Beach, Fish Eye, Gab Gab, and Tanguisson just standing on the coral like it’s not big deal. And FYI: it’s not better if you are barefoot. I don’t care what you stand on a polyp with. It is a tiny animal and you will kill it by standing on it.

Some coral can appear to be dead, but still have living sections on new corals trying to grow on top of the old. Just because it doesn’t look alive to you, doesn’t mean that it is not alive. So don’t stand on anything at all unless it is sand. If you can’t float well enough to adjust your mask or whatever in the water, then get out of the water to do it if you can’t find sand. Just don’t stand on the coral.

dont do it

And finally: Every time I go out I find trash. Every single time. Last time I went out I was at Gab Gab and I found a Planters Peanut bag. In Tumon Bay and at Tanguisson I usually find beer cans and flip flops. At Fish Eye I found umbrellas, sun glasses, hats, and all kinds of other garbage.

The point is this: The ocean is not your landfill. Stop dumping your trash in the ocean like it doesn’t matter. It matters a lot.

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

 

I guess what I really want you to do it be responsible and kind. Oh, and recently someone stole my flip flops off the rocks by the ocean while I was swimming. So although it should go without saying: Don’t steal people’s things while they are in the water!

Just be cool, folks. Be cool.

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA
One of the workers at Fish Eye feeding Squid to the turtle that used to live there. Don’t ever do that!

Sorry to sound harsh. I know this comes off as bitchy. But, I care deeply about nature, and I hate to see people hurting it.

I hope you’ll spread the word to others on the islands, and to anyone you know who is visiting an island soon.

Let’s take care of our oceans!

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA
An umbrella that we found wedged in some coral at Fish Eye. We took this picture with it before bringing it to shore to throw away.

Hawaiian Adventure

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

Before I moved to Guam, I had only been to Oahu once on my way to Maui. However, every flight to the mainland US from Guam seems to go through Oahu. So, I have gotten to know it over time. At first I went to the tourist spots that I had heard so much about, like Waikiki Beach.

I also got a chance to glimpse the serious feral cat population problem when I went to a scenic overlook. We have a feral dog problem on Guam so I completely understood how that happened.

I also did the food tour. I had pineapple chicken and other Hawaiian BBQ. However this trip, I drove around.

Dole

I already wrote about snorkeling at Electric Beach and The Three Tables. The underwater explorations were a lot of fun! I have never seen so many turtles in one place.

There were also lovely things on land, though.

I tried a Pineapple Shake at the Dole Pineapple Plantation. It had never occurred to me to put pineapple in a shake before, but it was good.

Tip for visiting the Dole Pineapple Plantation:

It was very crowded when I was there, which was a Thursday. I feel like it is always busy. If you want to do the tour, play in the maze, eat at the grill, and really enjoy it; you want to get there early and plan on spending the day there.

It is certainly the place to get all the pineapple you want.

I stayed at The Navy Lodge, which is on Ford Island. I found it amusing to stay on an island off the coast of an island.

Obviously The Navy Lodge isn’t something fancy like the resorts you see on Oahu. But it seems silly to pay for a fancy hotel room when you will only be there to sleep.

Besides, the flowers around the hotel were beautiful.

navy lodge on ford island

Passion flowers are actually my favorite, but they were not in season. None-the-less, there were plenty of flowers around to appreciate. The hotel had a lovely collection of bromeliads.

Of course, we have most of the same flowers on Guam. However, everything looks nicer when you are on vacation, doesn’t it?

weird red plant thing

I know there is a lot of really amazing hiking in Hawaii, and I hope to get the opportunity to do some hiking at some point. However, this trip was short, and we wanted to spend most of it in the water.

If you are interested in hiking, there are lots of really excellent websites that are devoted to hiking in Oahu.

The weather is cooler and less humid than the weather in Guam, so I imagine it is exactly as beautiful and not as sweaty.

purple antherium

Also, although I wrote about Electric Beach, Pupukea Maine Conservation District, and Turtle Beach; there are many other wonderful places to snorkel on Oahu.

There are some lovely websites devoted to places to snorkel, in case you are planning a trip there yourself and want to take a look.

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

The very best thing I finally found was Leonard’s Malasadas Truck. I had heard wonderful things about it from my Portuguese side of the family.

A malasada is a Portuguese donut which is a kind of sweet bread that is fried and rolled in sugar (or other things.) It is a tradition to eat them in Portugal of Shrove Tuesday, which is like Fat Tuesday in New Orleans.

malasada truck

In my family, we ate malsadas on New Year’s Day because we were already together for Christmas. There were my favorite part of the holidays.

Biting into a malasada was like biting into a little piece of my childhood, and I am really glad I finally came across Leonard’s. If you have never had a malasada, I highly recommend that you try one. They’re fantastic!

malasadas

Overall, it was a really nice trip to Oahu. I saw a lot of things I hadn’t seen before, and ran into things I didn’t even know I wanted to see.

Hopefully we’ll go back soon, because we have a friend living there now. Time to take advantage of someone else’s spare room the way people take advantage of ours.

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA